The reason I started this blog is because my first blog was started in the middle of my complete brokenness, but I wanted to be able to blog with hope and inspiration instead of in the middle of my despair. The idea for the name of the blog, however, and the tag line "a weaving of melodies of my life" (how awkwardly worded!), can include both joy and sorrow, contentment and pain. In music, dissonance makes the pretty even more spectacular.
I have a really good reason for not blogging in the last couple years. Despite my longtime childhood dream of being a writer, I avoid writing. When I write, the thoughts start rolling and the tears start falling. I don't often like to admit how I really feel, so I avoid feeling. Writing doesn't allow me to avoid it.
Avoidance is a skill I've been perfecting for some time now. My recent healthy living kick has lots of benefits for me and my family, but it's also provided me another outlet for my avoidance. I need to go forward with healthy living, but not use it as a means or an excuse to avoid my feelings, my struggles, my sins, my problems or my God.
Somehow I need to stop avoiding things and start facing them. I need to live life instead of avoiding it.
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